Microsoft Plans to Buy TikTok So They Can Steal Your Information Instead of China

TikTok has been in hot water with the discovery that it is actually Chinese spyware. India has already made the move to ban TikTok, while the US and Japan are discussing banning it as well. Microsoft, in a socially inept business move, is considering buying TikTok so, instead of China doing it, they can infiltrate the youth and start mining personal info. With an app that actively supports pedophilia, Bill Gates, with his connection to notorious pedophile Epstein, is a shoe in to take charge of TikTok.

Microsoft has faced some criticism before. They’ve track record includes involvement in war profiteering, support of U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement, inhumane labor practices, and helping the NSA collect information from users of various Microsoft products. Prowling on children seems to be the next logical step for Microsoft.

We interviewed Kevin, a big fan of Microsoft. “I don’t really care what they’re doing. I just know that XBox is way better than PlayStation and Lame-tendo. Plus the new Halo is coming out soon.” Thanks Kevin.