White Claws dominate the summer, but now Santa Claws are here to take over the holidays. The new Christmas-friendly hard seltzer is here. White Claws are the most popular alcoholic drink of the last two years. With the hype behind alcoholic seltzers at an all-time peak, it is only fitting that White Claws surprise the world with a third pack of flavors. Just in time for the holidays, ‘Santa Claws’ is coming to town. The new 12 pack of hard seltzers come with four new seasonal flavors bound to make everyone actually enjoy the holidays.
For the Weekly Broadcast of December 18th, we report on how Starbucks removes the ‘Santa Cream Latte’ from their menu, System of a Down’s new Christmas album, and the new Game & Watch all the kids want.
Starbucks is no stranger to holiday controversies. The ‘Santa Cream Latte’ was a huge hit during the 6 hours it was available. The new drink perfectly captured the holiday spirit, and fans were loving it. Reports suggest that the drink was a perfect blend of cream and peppermint. So why was the hit drink removed so quickly? It ends up the beverage was a bit inappropriate, and people were not happy to see it on the menu. Starbucks then removed their new seasonal drink from the menu.
System of a Down will finally reunite. The band thought now was the perfect time, as they can band together to raise awareness for a special cause very close to their hearts. This cause of course, involves Santa Clause. The band is reuniting to create a Christmas album. Not a lot of people are aware of Christmas or the importance of the holiday, and System of a Down are sure to change that. The new album “Jingle Bombs” is coming in 2020.
The PlayStation 5 has been difficult to find ever since launch, but it isn’t even the hottest gift option of 2020. Nintendo is once again dominating the Christmas season. The developer is having a major come back, with the Nintendo Switch still outselling even the PlayStation 5 and Xbox Series X on release month. The only thing that can compete with Nintendo at this point is Nintendo themselves. Times don’t change and this Christmas Nintendo is still on top. This tip is for the parents: the Game & Watch is the hottest gift of 2020.
For the Weekly Broadcast of December 11th, we explore why are these monoliths in Nintendo games? We also discuss Crazy Frog’s controversial return and a new Breaking Bad Spinoff.
For weeks now steel monoliths have been popping up around the globe. No one knows what it means or where they are coming from. It now seems that this could all be a publicity stunt from Nintendo. Monolith Soft are a developer for Nintendo that have worked on the Xenoblade games and helped with The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild. It cannot be a coincidence that the monoliths have appeared within Xenoblade Chronicles and Breath of the Wild respectively. Nintendo is about to announce something huge.
Crazy Frog is back and about time too. His Twitter account has recently become active again, which sparked fan speculation all across the globe. Is he planning a comeback? Is a new album on the horizon? Or is he just planning on launching an Onlyfans? No one knows for sure, but one thing is definitely for sure. Crazy Frog’s penis is now bigger than ever.
People can’t get enough. After Better Call Saul and El Camino: A Breaking Bad Movie, fans still demand more. We’ve see the rise and fall of Walter White, the history of Saul Goodman, and Jesse Pinkman continuing life after Walt. This new Breaking Bad Spinoff “The One Who Knocks,” could be called “The One Who Still Poopoos In His Pants,” because we’ll finally get backstory on Walter’s childhood years. We’ll see what formed him into the man we meet at the beginning of Breaking Bad.
For the Weekly Broadcast of December 4th, we report on the secret origin of pugs, Smosh finally joining in holy matrimony, and Disneyland’s new status as a strip club.
What exactly are Pugs? Previously it was believed that they are a breed of dog. New data suggests that Pugs are actually aliens from space. No one knows how or when they got on Earth. Most people accept them and love them for what they are. It is unknown how humans will respond to the fact that Pugs are aliens.
Fans of Smosh were heartbroken when Anthony left the team. However, it appears like the dynamic duo will finally become one again, this time in holy matrimony. The sexual tension has always been there between Anthony and Ian. It’s been obvious that there is chemistry there. The looks they give each other, the cute remarks, it’s obvious.
Disneyland is doing a major rebranding. Disneyland will no longer be an amusement parks. Amusement parks are closed indefinitely. Disneyland will be following the lead of other businesses that are allowed to remain open. Disneyland will now be filed as a strip club. The news is shocking to some, but welcoming to most. Whatever it takes to reopen Disneyland.
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For the Weekly Broadcast of November 27th, we report on Joe Exotic’s Disturbed’s “Sick” new album, Kangaroos ravaging Australia, and Youtube’s hit duo Ryan and George.
Disturbed have been busy during lockdown. The band has announced that they have been secretly creating an album, and it is already completed. The album will be called ‘Down With The Virus’ and it will be exactly what it sounds like. Disturbed wanted to create an album that will act as a guidebook to the covid-19 pandemic.
Move over covid-19, we have a new big killer. This Furry Friday we will be discussing the ignored apex predator from down under. Research suggests that the biggest killer in 2020 is the Kangaroo. While this only holds true in Australia, it is frightening to think that this marsupial has killed more people than covid-19. How did such a formidable enemy go under the radar like this? The scary part is, this isn’t new. Kangaroos haven’t randomly started committing murder; they always have been.
Ryan and George have taken Youtube by storm. The pair are best recognized from their Screen Rant ‘Pitch Meetings‘ and their very own ‘The First Guy‘ series. Whether one discovered them through the Pitch Meetings or through their personal channel is irrelevant, as their content is hilarious on either channel. Ryan and George aren’t just twins, they are also co-workers. Ryan writes all of the scripts and George does the video editing. They collaborate very well by utilizing their separate but equally impressive skills.
For the Weekly Broadcast of November 13th, we report on the Pirates of the Caribbean 6 overhaul, Jack Skellington’s ethnicity before he died, and the struggle of playing video games with toddlers.
With Johnny Depp’s current predicament, Pirates of the Caribbean 6 is up in the air. Depp’s iconic role of Jack Sparrow is the heart of soul of the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise. No more Jack Sparrow lands this upcoming film in a tough spot. Depp packed theaters with his quirky, charismatic pirate persona. Nonetheless, the producers and writers of the film are coming up with a new spin for Pirates 6 that won’t rely on Jack Sparrow. Fans are wondering, how could you still make this movie when the only entertaining part of the franchise is gone? What’s the point of this new movie if it’ll just be Pirates of the Caribbean with none of the content that made the previous movies enjoyable?
The Nightmare Before Christmas is a beloved holiday movie. The juxtaposes horror and wonder, and fans embraced the film with open minds and open hearts. The film was the first of its kind, and it remains a classic to this day. The film just became even more significant though. Forever fans have wondered who Jack Skellington was before he died, and now they finally have an answer. Tim Burton has confirmed that Jack Skellington was black. This is a huge deal because this means that The Nightmare Before Christmas was the first Disney film to star a black man.
I love my son. He is growing up to be a huge Nintendo fan like I myself am. Unfortunately he is still only three years old. His abilities are limited, and unfortunately so is my patience. I figured I would playthrough Pikmin 3 with my son. I played the game on the Wii U, and I figured this would spice things up, and give me a chance to bond with my son. Unfortunately, I was so wrong. Tensions within the family have been rough since our initial playthrough. My son just couldn’t grasp the game. I am talking Pikmin extinction status levels of irresponsibility. I will never be allowing my son to get a pet after I saw how he handled the Pikmin.
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For the Weekly Broadcast of November 6th, we dive into Rise Against as Rise Against releases new album Tuck Frump, Pokemon Sword and Shield’s worst additions, and A Day to Remember renaming their new album.
Rise Against, just days before the election, chose a highly impactful moment to announce this album. Rise Against is an outspoken, politically driven punk rock band. Their messages are usually liberal in nature. They are antiwar and have spoken out against the Bush and Trump administrations. Continuing this ideology, they announced their newest album. Titled “TUCK FRUMP,” it’s pretty clear what the message is behind this one. Frontman Tim McIlrath has been hinting at new music in the works, and now we finally get a taste.
Countless amounts of new Pokemon were added to the Crown Tundra expansion, but some of them should have remained extinct. Fans were initially upset after the removal of nearly 600 beloved Pokemon. Unfortunately Game Freak added plenty of Pokemon back, but maybe they didn’t have the best judgement. This is the Pokemon Sword and Shield: Crown Tundra’s worst new additions.
A Day To Remember haven’t had much to say about their upcoming album “You’re Welcome”, but now an announcement has finally been made. A Day To Remember is changing the album name. “You’re Welcome” will now be called “We’re Sorry”. The name is likely a reference to the album having a whole year worth of delays. Originally slated for November 15th 2019, the album still has no confirmed release date. The band has yet to apologize for the delays, so they figured they could just put it in the album’s title. The move makes sense. Every fan now will have an apology directly on in front of them.
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For the Weekly Broadcast of October 30th, we report on the new Borat lawsuit from his craziest stunt yet, Dr. Fauci favorite sex positions, Minecraft Steve in Super Smash Bros, Amazon Prime Voting, and more.
This isn’t the first Borat lawsuit. Everyone loves and remembers Borat. Now with Borat 2 on the horizon, fans are even more excited. Let’s take a look at Borat’s antics from his first film. Some of which landed Sacha Baron Cohen, the actor and brains behind Borat, in legal trouble. Sacha Baron Cohen is taking his stunts to a new level for Borat 2. This film is being produced and released in the midst of a pandemic, but that hasn’t stopped Borat from harassing the public like never before. This new Borat lawsuit is caused by the hijacking of a school bus.
Dr. Fauci has said a lot throughout 2020. His professional opinion is highly respected. Now Dr. Fauci finally spills the beans. He just revealed the top 5 heathiest sexual positions of all time. This list contains details on the 5 best sexual position that he recommends.
For some odd reason, Steve’s meat has been removed from Super Smash Brothers Ultimate. The internet made some jokes about Steve’s victory screen. These were only jokes though. Fans joked about Steve’s victory pose because it looks as if he is holding his penis. In Minecraft, Steve can hold and eat meat to regain health. Steve was merely participating in a post battle meal, but the internet made a joke out of it. No one really thought this was Steve’s penis, but now Nintendo had the victory pose removed. This only makes it more suspicious. Why would Nintendo removed what was obviously Steve holding meat? Could it really have been his penis after all?
Have you ever been concerned about have a Disneyland Theme Park Character cover you in saliva droplets? Your fears are now over. Disneyland will now be forcing their Theme Park Characters to wear additional masks over their mouths. No one knows if the move is to physically stop viral contagions from transferring to others. It could be that the change is more metaphorical in nature.
The USPS has been useless for awhile. The service is often slow and unproductive. UPS and Amazon Prime have always delivered with urgency and came with great costumer service. The USPS is having trouble competing with the other delivery services. The government has funded the USPS since it’s inception. However, this funding is coming to an end. Americans are wondering how they will vote now, and Amazon has the answer. The company announced that an Amazon Prime subscription will now come with Prime-Voting.
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For the Weekly Broadcast of October 23rd, we discuss how you can never say this word, how Crazy Frog steal the innocence of children, a dangerous liberal agenda, and more.
My childhood was great except for Crazy Frog. I grew up with the internet at my fingertips. Almost like a babysitter, YouTube was my main source of entertainment. The hours I spent watching some of the early, popular YouTubers formed my taste is media. For example, Fred, Smosh, Nigahiga, sxephil, and more all had their mark on me. Sometimes their content had an adult joke that I didn’t fully understand. Nonetheless, I loved their videos. My childhood was great until one moment that I’ll never forget.
Chris Pratt exposed! Chris Pratt is a Christian role model in Hollywood. He is considered an icon for his traditional American ways, and his unique brand of publicly broadcasting his religion. Chris Pratt has no shame, which is why he got engaged merely minutes after divorcing his ex. wife. Many fans defend Pratt. They say that he can do whatever he wants after being a religious man. Other fans weren’t so forgiving. These fans saw through the rouse and realized one thing. Chris Pratt cheated on his wife the Christian way.
The libs are at it again. This time they are recommending murder. The liberal agenda suggest that the best way to make Trump lose is to literally steal his votes. Liberals say this can be achieved by killing older voters and committing voter fraud. The strategy sounds a bit immortal, but they guarantee it isn’t. In response to the controversy, one liberal said “You know what is immoral? Caging Kids. A wrong against the wrong makes a right. I am an expert on directions so I can confirm this is true”.
Everyone hates Disneyland lines. The park is chalk full of two and a half hour waits for a 3 minute ride. $120 dollars to walk in the heat and stand in lines. Hence, it’s no surprise this man adopted a physically disabled child. People with disabilities have major perks. Mainly, they skip lines at Disneyland. People drag their wheelchair bound friends and family members to the park. Disabled people are the perfect target. First, they can’t fight back. Second, as long as there is one disabled person, the entire group gets to skip the line. Why not take advantage of this opportunity?
Donald Trump has officially made an executive order to declare “honkey” the world’s first truly offensive word. The law makes the word objectively an offensive word. There has been a lot of debate on what makes a word offensive, but for the first time there is official word. Some have considered the move to be a form of pandering. Donald Trump seems to be hoping to secure the honkey vote by passing this executive order. Democrats are likely to try and appeal the executive order. They claim that honkey is too damn fun to say, and that the word never harmed anyone. Far right wing conservatives state this is another double standard created by the liberals.
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For the Weekly Broadcast of October 16th, we ask the question Who is Joji? We also discuss the Pixel 4a’s pornhub functionality, Barack Obama’s COVID-19 highlights, Disneyland, Avengers butts, and the Last of Us Part II.
WHO IS JOJI? CONSPIRACY THEORY EXPOSED | Weekly Broadcast
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Joji Is Filthy Frank? New Wild Internet Conspiracy Gains Traction
Joji is a major breakthrough artist that has achieved major success in a short amount of time. He is part of the musical collective group 88Rising, which achieved major success, having one of the most popular songs of the last summer. Joji’s sudden appearance has everyone asking where he came from. How can a random man in his early 20’s reach so much success so quickly? He has connections that no random people could, so who is Joji really? Joji was noticed soon after the disappearance of youtube icon Filthy Frank. This has conspiracy theorist thinking one thing. Are they the same person?
The PornHub app inevitably ends up being installed on all smart phone devices one way or another, but the Pixel 4A beats all others to the punch. Google has announced that the Pixel 4A will have the added convenience of having the PornHub app pre-installed on all devices. The progressive move has the world stunned, as porn will become more normalized than ever before.
Barack Obama has stayed in the public eye far passed his presidency. Today, he is practically a celebrity figure. His endorsements can sway politics. His lists of favorite movies, songs, and books can drive sales. Although he’s no longer a government figure, his words continue to carry great power. Recently he released his list of his favorite Lockdown Moments since the COVID-19 pandemic began!
In preparation for Disneyland’s reopening later this year, cast members are minimizing risk. Disney’s coronavirus response has faced huge criticisms. People are unhappy with Florida’s Disneyworld opening as coronavirus cases sky rocket. Although Disneyworld has socially distanced lines and rides, frequent cleaning, and limited occupancy, it is believed to have contributed to the pandemic. California is a virus hotspot, and Disneyland would surely contribute to the cases. Nonetheless, Disneyland builds toward an opening, and Disney’s coronavirus response takes surprising turns.
Pokémon has been a difficult concept for parents to grasp since its inception. Parents often ask retail employees for “Pokéman” or “Pocketmon” merchandise during the holiday season. Due to this, the popular multimedia franchise will drop that confusing accent from its name. The slight name change will increase profits drastically for Nintendo. Pokémon Sword and Shield is known to be a lazy game by the online community. Nintendo cites the Pokémon accent as the reason for cutting corners. The company believes that 35% of revenue is lost due to difficulty pronouncing the series name.
Avenger fans typically get along due to the fact that they already have so much in common. Recent gameplay footage of the new Marvel: Avengers game has fans divided though. The new gameplay shows exceptional footage of the characters’ rears. This has fans all asking the same question; which Avenger butt is best? The current analysis is that Hulk objectively has the nicest butt, but is it fair to let a gamma boosted booty take the crown? Black Widow fans declare that she has the nicest butt, and she earned it fair and square.
The reception to The Last of Us Part II has been mixed. Hardcore fans of the original game thought the sequel did a poor job continuing the legacy of the franchise. The characters, plot, and game play seems like it falls far below the expectations of the fans. Some people did enjoy the game, but the core, disgruntled fan base is unhappy. Strangely enough, there was one factor that united all players of the game. One surprise variable saved the reputation of The Last of Us Part II, among the casual gamer and the hardcore fan.
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