Does New Mutants Have Corona?

The corona virus has the whole world on standby. As people are frustrated and bored, one movie decided to release anyways. The idea sounds desperate, and that is because it is. The final Fox X-Men film “New Mutants” has officially released to theaters. Executives at Fox figured that if the movie had absolutely no competition, it might make a few bucks. They were wrong. New Mutants has released to the lowest reviews and lowest sales of any X-Men film ever. This includes the incredibly disliked “Dark Phoenix” from 2019.

Not only is New Mutants an absolutely unnecessary movie in general, it is extra unnecessary during this pandemic. Individuals have engaged in risky behaviors during the summer. This is likely due to increased frustration coming from an extensive quarantining period. This is not an excuse to go see New Mutants, as it not only is risky, but it isn’t even worst it at all.

If New Mutants Is So Bad, What Other Ways Can I Go Contract The Corona Virus?

If you are intentionally trying to get sick, New Mutants is not the best way to do this. We have prepared a list of the top 5 ways to contract covid-19 that is better than seeing New Mutants in theaters.

1. Attend a Smash Mouth concert. Smash Mouth has no regard for human life. The band has started playing shows again, and their latest show caused 100 new covid-19 cases and counting. This sounds like a safe bet.
2. Become a professional Wal-Mart greeter. Most greeters outside of stores are keeping their distance, and are only greeting guests vocally. This would not work for someone trying to contract Covid-19. One would want to break down these barriers and start shaking hands with everyone trying to enter Wal-Mart.
3. Throw a viewing party for literally any other movie and have open invites to the population of Huntington Beach, California. Huntington Beach is a hot spot for Covid-19. The residents seem like they thrive on trying to contract the virus. A house party is a lot more fun than seeing a movie in theaters, and the drinks can be a lot less expensive. You could also have a better movie than New Mutants playing at the viewing.
4. Open up a kissing booth on Huntington Beach Pier. As mentioned in the previous point, Huntington Beach residents thrive on Corona Virus. If you were to open a kissing booth at Huntington Beach Pier, you not only could guarantee residents to give you a smooth, but you could also guarantee that they will have the Corona Virus.
5. Literally anything else. Seeing the New Mutants in theaters is literally the lamest way to contract the Corona Virus. I would respect anyone else much more than someone who saw New Mutants in theaters. This includes risky Las Vegas trips, unsafe house parties, international travel and flight, and even stripper pole licking. Anything is a cooler way to contract a virus than seeing New Mutants in theaters.

Realible World News will be sure to update the article with death counts and confirmed Covid-19 cases as it is revealed.